Tag Archives: lost

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Heartshaped Tears

Each day as the numbers rise, the lump in my throat grows larger as I am reminded that they are more than just numbers. Someone is losing a loved one. Someone is worried they will lose a loved one. Someone is feeling cut-off and alone, like there may be no way out. I feel helpless and the tears cannot be held back. I shed tears filled with love because love is one thing that has not been stopped when the brakes were put on the world as we knew it.

I am posting the link to two songs that I feel offer hope and peace. I send love to you, my fellow readers.

You’re Gonna Be Okay by Brian & Jenn Johnson

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LjF9IqvXDjY

Be Still My Soul by Kari Jobe

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Tarnished Tiara

Her zombie steps shuffle along streets and alleys,
hair knotted and matted in unintended dreadlocks.
The cracked husk of her tarnished veneer reflects,
momentarily, in a boutique window and catches her eye.

Startled, she stares.

She glimpses a forgotten piece of her former self
beyond the plate glass. Flickers of another life
glint like sunshine on the glazed surface. Her
eyes close against the brightness.

A businessman in a navy suit, talking on his phone,
bumps her out of her reverie. He hurries on
without a glance, like stepping over dog shit.

She withdraws,
a hermit crab sliding into the safety of her shell,
disappears into her invisible life, slinking
along the streets.

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Lost

I have already lost them
it happened a long time ago
one day a decision was made
there was no turning back
Reality is harsh
denial a trap
the sooner I find acceptance
healing can begin

Little boy optimism
little girl hugs
drifting away ephemerally
like the puff of a dandelion
blowing in the wind

Dreams die hard
I do not want to let go
this is not how it is supposed to be

I want a fairy tale
a castle in the sky
I want promises of happily ever after

When did it happen
my world falling in upon itself
when did the yellow brick road
become a bed of hot coals

Every phone ringing
brings a fear of the worst
every siren
a racing heart

A pasted on smile
a mask for the world to see
so difficult to accept
you are lost to me

When did I lose myself
how can I get her back

If I don’t have hope
what is left

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Searching

Sadness, sorrow, melancholy, blue
underlying feeling of loss
on the outside
can’t see in

Been together a long time
part of me won’t belong
No blame
No fault
part of life
hurts just the same
impossible to ignore

Not sure where I belong
don’t quite fit in
“Blood is thicker than water”
Not true!
How can own flesh and blood
own DNA
push one aside?
How horrible

Don’t feel real

so much promise
so much disappointment

struggle to maintain balance

push hard, run far
momentary blank
hurt from exertion
instead of internal pain that rises

problem yours
not mine
Not so!
can’t pretend nothing is wrong

Silence
holds far reaching repercussions

drifting, senseless unease

Many wonderful opportunities
Daily gifts provoke gratitude
Still…

Deep sense of something missing
close to the edge
threatens to swallow me
Whole

A fine balance
take care not to misstep

Weave and dodge through daily routine
skill of one who seems to have it all
A smile here, nod there,
cluck of disapproval
hug for one in need

Others oblivious

Terror
slip in the abyss

Hide it well

Sadness permeates all I do
Take nothing for granted

Much to be grateful for
If only I knew
Where I belong

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shadow

a shadow crossed Nigeria
those in its path
were swallowed
enveloped by unspeakable evil

hideous laughter rose above
tortured cries for help
cries of anguish

captors mocked and taunted victims
voiced threats
while the world watched

friends and family of the captives
begged for mercy on behalf of
their loved ones
they pled to the world
help us now
and the world responded

tweets lit up the airwave
facebook and blogs sent posts
speeding around the globe
righteous indignation shared
and the world fumed

the innocents are still not found

social media participants
may feel they have done their part
after all they made known their disapproval
they took a stand….

but those enveloped in shadow
remain lost

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Inner City Street Kids

inner city street kids
who are you
inner city street kids
what do you do

where did you come from
where is your home
what do you do at night
where do you roam

who wrote you off
what happened to your dreams
was it one decision or two
to create a life as hard as yours seems

urban urchin
dweller of the slums
mischievous and raggedly
trusting no one

invisible to many
no place to live
falling through the cracks
like water through a sieve

there is a danger of getting lost
of descending deep into nowhere
second chances come
listen, they are there

life can be hard
but remember it’s precious and purposeful
fight your way back
in any way workable

show yourself
regardless of the obstacles
fight for what is worthy
to be more powerful

in a world made more beautiful
what would you desire most
what would ignite your passion
make you boast

inner city street kids
full of erratic emotion
inner city street kids
causing commotion

who are you
from where did you come
such beautiful souls
neglected, on the run