Lost

I have already lost them
it happened a long time ago
one day a decision was made
there was no turning back
Reality is harsh
denial a trap
the sooner I find acceptance
healing can begin

Little boy optimism
little girl hugs
drifting away ephemerally
like the puff of a dandelion
blowing in the wind

Dreams die hard
I do not want to let go
this is not how it is supposed to be

I want a fairy tale
a castle in the sky
I want promises of happily ever after

When did it happen
my world falling in upon itself
when did the yellow brick road
become a bed of hot coals

Every phone ringing
brings a fear of the worst
every siren
a racing heart

A pasted on smile
a mask for the world to see
so difficult to accept
you are lost to me

When did I lose myself
how can I get her back

If I don’t have hope
what is left

3 thoughts on “Lost

  1. Meghan says:

    Powerful. Without saying it directly I can hear such strong emotion in your reverie. Significant that at the end you switch from “you are lost to me”, which I take to mean those in your life who were once closer, to “When did I lose myself/ How can I get her back?” Dreams do die hard yet they are our own creations! If one dream seems to have faded away there is always hope. We need only create a new dream. Simple, though not always easy!

  2. mincs1 says:

    Interesting that you have chosen to comment about those last few lines. When I re-read what I had written I considered deleting them but in the end felt they were necessary to tell/portray a deeper level of what I was feeling. I appreciate your opinion, Meghan!

    • Meghan says:

      I think your instinct to keep those last few lines was a good one! By the way, I loved your line “when did the yellow brick road become a bed of hot coals?” An excellent question yet it amazes me how often I feel grief or anger or resentment when Life changes my road. Why do I only want the best, the happiest, the ever-after? Surely the yellow brick road would be far less joyous if we never experienced the occasional bed of hot coals!

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