Running Late

Jacket is slowly retrieved,
carefully put on.
Scheduled appointment time
has long since come and gone.

Waiting for an indication,
some reason for this to-do
rather than being left alone
by myself to sit and stew.

Simple words remain
unsaid.
Billowing images rise
instead.

Thoughts fly
to delirious heights;
trailing hurt and anger
ready to ignite.

No explanation given
for the unexpected delay.
Patience wears thin
with the lengthening day.

Minutes pass,
magazine pages are read.
Still no one comes out,
nothing is said.

Jacket is buttoned,
zippers zip.
Do not reschedule.
Never mind a tip!

Waiting

“You make a life out of what you have, not what you’re missing.” – Kate Morton

disappointment

again

lump in throat
waiting for a call that doesn’t come

mind racing
to account for reason why
thoughts toss and tumble
adrift on rough waters
of stormy emotions

tears surface but do not fall
a blind barrier
camouflaged by past hunts
to make sense of behaviour
has arisen

resignation
sadness
suffuse the room
blocking sunlight
covering all with a blanket of grey melancholy

although much has changed
much remains the same

Reaching Out

How difficult it must be for you
Here I am
wallowing in my own self-pity
Poor me
Woe is me
What must it be like for you
How difficult is it to contain your anger
Or is it disappointment
Disapproval
Sadness

Sad for the loss of a life
you hoped to have
Two parents who live together happily ever after
Perhaps you’ve been disappointed in who I am
Seeing me as I am
flaws out there for all to see
Not acceptable
Not the person you had in mind

Maybe you feel you had to make a choice
Not so
I’ve never been given a chance
to argue my case
Do I have a case
It wasn’t me asking you to make a choice

Whatever your reason
it doesn’t matter
I’m sad
I can’t deny that
I want you to know
no matter what
I love you
I want only the best for you
I wish you well
Perhaps one day
I will fit into your life, too

Mistaken Identity?

You dropped by
to say hi
today
A whisper from my past

Time has a way
of shrouding memories
and yours
has become cloaked
in an opaque veil

I wanted to remember!

Your enthusiasm and
excitement of reuniting
was apparent
I responded with an equally
enthusiastic greeting, I thought,
but something betrayed me

Was it the eyes?
Hesitation?
Questioning intonation at the end of hello?

My mind stretched and strained
for something to trigger
a flood of memories

Asked point blank
if I remembered you
I had to humbly admit
no

the sharp knife of honesty

Although my memory is vague
and it is possible you may be mistaken
I am sorry
I disappointed you