I love that you wrote about the solstice again, Mary! I should have done the same. I really like this haiku expect for one word: “festive” for the sun. You have totally captured the fact the the sun is rebirthing, so given that would the descriptor “festive” really be the best fit, I wonder? Absolutely there are festivals around the solstice. Would “Sleeping” sun work??
I appreciate your feedback, Meghan. I think you are right that I didn’t leave quite the right impression with the last line. Maybe dormant or sluggish would be better descriptors for a sun that is to be rebirthed; what do you think?
I love that you wrote about the solstice again, Mary! I should have done the same. I really like this haiku expect for one word: “festive” for the sun. You have totally captured the fact the the sun is rebirthing, so given that would the descriptor “festive” really be the best fit, I wonder? Absolutely there are festivals around the solstice. Would “Sleeping” sun work??
I appreciate your feedback, Meghan. I think you are right that I didn’t leave quite the right impression with the last line. Maybe dormant or sluggish would be better descriptors for a sun that is to be rebirthed; what do you think?
Sluggish, hesitant, shy: some sense of these might work.